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Monday, July 9, 2012

Old Age, Marriage and Not Sweating the Small Stuff

I turned 42 on Saturday.  They say, “With old age comes wisdom”, so, either I missed the epiphany, or I’m not old yet.

However, one realization I have come to is that you truly have to stop sweating the small stuff.  Especially in marriage.  There are little things that my hubby does that irritate me.  I know there are reciprocal things for him.  At times, they can really get under my skin and make me mad.  This is especially true when other stressors are in play from outside. 
So…  The other day while reading my friend Lisa’s marriage advice that I posted here, I decided I could just stop letting those small things get to me.  Yep, it actually was just that simple.

When he leaves all the medications out on the counter instead of putting them away, I can either spend half a day grumpy or I can simply put them away.  If he doesn’t rinse off the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher and some come out dirty – I can spend half a day grumpy or just wash them again.  You get the idea…

It’s about expending unneeded energy on the little things that don’t really matter.  I often tell my kids – the amount of time you spent arguing about it, you could have had it done.  It’s certainly true here. 
Life has been calmer since I made my resolution.  I think he’s noticed a difference.  We certainly get through the day with a smile instead of being cross, which is SO worth the few extra minutes it takes to not let things get under my skin.

So, maybe I did get a little wiser…  I think wisdom and age must be must less an epiphany and much more a process…  I’ll have plenty of years, God willing, to find out. 

What could you give your spouse a pass on today?  What could you just let go instead of getting angry so that your time with your spouse can be happy?

3 comments:

  1. I totally agree!! My hubby likes to sleep a little late on Saturdays, so I always have to get up with the kids. (My oldest is disabled and has to have someone up with her.) I used to get mad about it every single Saturday, but several years ago I decided it just wasn't worth it! There have been other similar things here and there, and life is so much happier when I decide to just let it go! Thanks for the reminder!

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  2. This is very thought provoking and I can see how it has the potential to change lives. It's a way forward, I think. Thanks April.

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    1. You know, Eileen, I haven't been doing it too long, but it's made a big difference for me and for us. I just don't worry so much about those little things. Just taking care of them helps me about as much as it helps us.

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