The Cricket Ate my Homework

I guess I should explain. We have a very sweet, very docile bearded dragon named Marley. He’s a beautiful specimen of dragon with a large spikey beard, long majestic tale, and googly eyes that like to stare at you when you are talking to him.


In order to enjoy this little gem, I have to feed him worms and crickets. We had been off of crickets for a while. He was being finicky and not only wouldn’t eat his vegetables, but wouldn’t have anything to do with crickets. It was superworms or nothing for this big boy.

Lately, he’s decided to be more adventurous once again. He went through a great molt. He’s looking spiffy in his new skin and is enjoying the delicacies that I offer. One of those being crickets. I had forgotten that I didn’t like keeping crickets. They are noisy, they smell, and they escape. Hence the issue with the homework.

One fell on my head yesterday. I was none too pleased and immediately introduced him to Marley who made short order of the situation. However, today, I kept hearing something. The crickets are in a tub that is supposed to prevent escape, but, given yesterday’s experience, I knew better. Where was it? I checked the cabinet I keep them in and found no escapees running around. Then, I heard chewing. Chewing? It wasn’t Marley. I look around, and in my work cubby is a cricket eating away at my papers. Who knew they ate paper? Well… I guess some of you knew, but I didn’t. It occurred to me that “The Cricket Ate My Homework” probably wouldn’t be a viable excuse as the damage he could do would be limited, but, nonetheless, there he was a munching. He too was introduced to Marley… So, I guess, inadvertently, the Dragon ate my homework.